In a prior post, I wrote about how your consciousness goes from wholeness to fragmentation when you are “socialized” growing up, placing you in quite a pickle and in a lot of unnecessary suffering.Embed from Getty Images
As interesting as that situation is, it is always more productive to know how to deal with it. So, how do you become aware of things that you purposely split away from for the sake of your own survival?Embed from Getty Images
There are multiple ways you can do this… From psychoanalytic psychotherapy, to meditation and self reflection, you can find multiple ways to regain self-awareness, but I’m going to help you out start on your own in this post…
You hold the whole world inside you on some level… All aspects of yourself, whether conscious or unconscious, manifest in your external world as a living mirror of your consciousness. The way you experience them varies though, depending on whether you have that part of yourself integrated into your conscious mind or not. An easy way to notice this phenomenon is through your relationship with others.
When you empathize with someone, you recognize that person’s situation to the point that you feel it in yourself. This happens because a part of your conscious mind can relate to that person. Maybe you have been in the other person’s place, maybe you can imagine yourself to be. The point is, that it is acceptable for you to be in that situation. What you’re witnessing in the moment is something you haven’t been forced to split away from.
Now let’s talk about the sides of yourself lying in your unconscious mind. In a general way of speaking (this is actually infinitely more complex), you will have 2 types or typical reactions towards unconscious aspects of yourself when encountering relationships.
Sometimes you will find yourself incredibly attracted to individuals manifesting personality traits you have denied in yourself. For example, if you tend towards apathy, and have split from the energetic aspect of you, you will likely be very attracted to someone productive and will idealize his/her qualities. Over time nevertheless, you will also start judging these same qualities you were attracted to before, because to fully accept them in others, would mean to accept them within yourself, and you’re not going allow that to happen that easily.Embed from Getty Images
Now please don’t think that every time you find yourself frustrated about something related to another person it has to somehow be related to the unconscious mind (or is it?).Embed from Getty Images
Now on the flip side, there are aspects of you lying in your unconscious mind that are utterly unacceptable as I have mentioned in another article. It is impossible for you to empathize with them as that would mean recognizing these aspects within yourself, which would bring the “life-threatening” feeling you had when you originally split away from this part. When you are confronted with this side of yourself, you will resort to defensiveness, judgement, and avoidance. You will try to push it as far away as you can from you (or run from it).Embed from Getty Images
Start by noticing these shifts in your emotions and actions when interacting with others. This is a way your body communicates the lack of harmony coming from a split in your mind. When you notice it, please consider that you have the whole world inside you, all the “goodness” and all the “badness” is actually part of yourself. That fear preventing you to notice these “demons” in you will disappear the moment to you take a good stare at them. This is when you realize their illusory nature. The moment you recognize and integrate these fragments of yourself, the closer you find yourself to freedom.Embed from Getty Images